Category Archives: General Rantings

Why are French women so slim?

I keep getting Vogue articles on my Facebook feed with this title and it is doing my head in.   I don’t think that we should be fed this kind of blether by our anti-social media.  Anyhow, in this article I would like to reveal a few rules that they live by which seem to give them a very positive attitude to food.

And a positive attitude to food helps towards having a positive attitude to life n’est ce pas?

First of all, French women are not all so slim.  Any French woman will arch her beautiful eyebrows and tell you that.

I do sometimes have this conversation with my friends.  As normal lady people they are generally mystified by this particular stereotype.

So first things first:  French women are lovely and they do come in all shapes and sizes like in every other country in the world.  There might be statistically more slim people in France than elsewhere but lets say that having lived here for the past fifteen years I think it is a stereotype – a bit like all Irish people are leprechauns.

Although it is true that we all believe in fairies.  Or at least I do.  Moving on.

However I think that generally speaking the French only half realise it but they have lots of rules.  And as long as they stick to those rules they generally don’t worry too much.  The rules are as wide as your average French boulevard and allow lots of fun and everybody sticks to them, so they seem to work.

Eight key ones just in case you are curious. Continue reading Why are French women so slim?

So – I cut the cheese wrong

So after having written the blog Cheesy Smile and done the little tutorial I then proceeded to cut the cheese exactly the wrong way the very next day.

Full exposure (this is painful); the one on the left – I cut it parallel to the crust instead of perpendicular.  I was busy blethering to himself hence I was distracted.  Which is always fatal in such a scenario.

Cue himself laughing like a devil as I proceeded to try to cut a second slice without shaving bits of finger off. Sigh.

Being one’s self is not always easy.  But somewhere somehow this may encourage some poor soul not to give up hope (because there is always someone worse than you).

 

Scoopy-Doo

Pet hate: dog poo on the pavement.

I like animals. We have a cat that lives in and around our building and he is a wee pet.  I get a real giggle out of facebook animal videos shared by friends. The rhino who thinks he is a sheep is one of my favourites.  The sheep who thinks he is a dog is another favourite.  straying off topic now..

Anyway what I don’t like is picking my way through dog poo on pavements. What I like even less is trying to guide my kids through the minefield.

This morning I was walking behind two women with buggies, and at one point they had to organise themselves into a single file formation to make it through a particularly dense battlefield peppered with splattered poopy.  This prompted some vociferous reactions involving goddamn dog do and the unpleasantness of it all.   They were particularly grumpy and I totally got it.  I particularly enjoyed the term “poo slalom”.  (With a buggy, that is what it amounts to.)

I suspect most people are probably like me and have nothing against the dogs, but we are wondering what the hell are the owners thinking?

One day about a year ago I came out of my apartment building and nearly stepped on a newly released production. It was literally 10cm outside the front door and while it was quite small, its location was deadly.  With the laws of nature/probability and all things physical everybody in the apartment block was going to end up with dog doo on their shoes within twenty-four hours.

That particular day as I continued on my way stepping carefully around the offending pungent pile of goop, I looked up and saw a man with his dog. They were strolling along nonchalantly and the dog had that “je ne sais quoi” spring its step.

As it happened, it wasn’t the first time I had come across such offerings on our front door step. I suspected this was their haunting place and I was curious to know whether this was his favourite spot and more importantly whether he realized that it was our front door.

So I approached the happy couple, and asked the human to clarify the situation.

He bared his teeth at me and said that he did indeed realize that it was the front door of an apartment block but that he didn’t care at all (not his apartment block, not his problem). And then he continued on his way.

I was considered picking up his canine friend’s abandoned fecal matter and throwing it at him. But weighing up the pros and cons I just headed to work.

Then I wonder, why don’t we have the same problem in Ireland?

Perhaps it is just the fact that it rains so much that it cleans the pavement immediately? I have no idea.

Either way, I would like to send this plea out into the ether – please gather your dog-doo if not for us, for the children!!! They don’t look where they are walking and they are always putting their feet in their mouths….